Lessons in Love from Charlotte’s Web
                          
(This is the lesson I gave in Relief Society in February.  It is an amalgam of information from several sources.)

Good Morning, Sisters.

Those of you who have previously endured my lessons know that I frequently quote from classical literature, more often than not from works that only an English major would ever read.  You will be happy to know that although I will, yet again, be extensively referencing literature today, there will be no mention of Cicero, Shakespeare, Chaucer or Dostoevsky; the book in question is one you have probably all read.  (Pull out Charlotte’s Web.  Pause for effect.)

In case it’s been awhile since you read Charlotte’s Web, the following is a short plot summary:

        After sparing the life of a baby piglet almost slaughtered due to his status as runt of the litter, a little girl named Fern Arable adopts the piglet and nurtures it lovingly, naming it Wilbur. However, she is crushed when the piglet matures enough to be separated from his mother and sent to reside on a farm owned by Fern's uncle, Homer Zuckerman. Her powerful attachment to Wilbur is mutual; the pig is left yearning for companionship but is snubbed by other barn animals. However, he is welcomed by an unseen voice who promises to befriend him, vowing to reveal itself to him in the morning.

        The voice is revealed to belong to a spider named Charlotte who lives on a web spun overlooking Wilbur's enclosure. Knowing of Wilbur's impending doom (as the Zuckermans plan on slaughtering him) she promises to hatch a plan guaranteed to spare his life and ensures Wilbur that he will see the snows of winter. Sure enough, the following morning the Zuckermans are flabbergasted to catch sight of the words "SOME PIG" woven into the spiderweb, attracting great recognition and publicity. Understanding that Wilbur's chances of survival will be strengthened if similar miracles were to occur, Charlotte employs the assistance of Templeton, the barnyard rat, in gathering labels as inspiration for her spiderweb messages. As time passes, more and more messages concerning Wilbur's value continue to appear on Charlotte's webs, attracting increasing notoriety and publicity. Soon Wilbur is entered in the county fair.  He travels there in a crate, accompanied by Charlotte and the gluttonous Templeton, whose interest is piqued by the promise of discarded foods littered along the fair grounds, and, while there, Charlotte spins an egg sac containing her unborn offspring, to which she refers as her “magnum opus,” or “great work”.  This egg sac is heavily guarded by Wilbur. However, he is crestfallen when Charlotte notifies him of her impending death and mentions that she will not return to the farm with him, instead staying behind at the fairgrounds and dying after Wilbur's departure. Heartbroken, Wilbur transports Charlotte's egg sac with him in his crate back to the farm, and is saddened further when the new spiders hatch and depart shortly after their birth, leaving behind three spiderlings who are too small to leave just yet. Pleased at the thought of finding new friends after Charlotte's demise, Wilbur names the spiderlings, and the book concludes by mentioning that more and more generations of spiders continued to arrive with time to keep Wilbur---who is now safe from death---company.
Over the Christmas break, my daughter was given the assignment to revisit a favourite childhood book with special attention to theme.  Hayley chose Charlotte’s Web and together we came to the conclusion that the overarching theme in this book is love.  As I helped Hayley write her paper, I realized that, with a little tweaking (such as the incorporation of some thoughts from President Uchtdorf’s October 2009 Conference Talk entitled, “The Love of God”), I could turn her paper into my Relief Society lesson, given that February seems a logical time to discuss the topic of Love.  So, here goes.

LOVE IS...Sticking Up for Those Who Can't Stick Up for Themselves; Caring for Those Who Can't Care for Themselves: In the beginning of the book, Fern rescued the newborn piglet Wilbur from the axe. He was going to be killed because he was a runt. Fern told her father, "It's unfair; he can't help being born small....Would you have killed me if I was born small?"  Fern takes responsibility for the pig, making the commitment to care for him.  This is similar to what the Saviour has asked us to do in our own lives.

(Read Quote #1)
“For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.  Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?  When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?  Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?  And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.”   Matthew 25:35-40

(Read Quote #2)
“Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, To visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction.” James 1:27

LOVE IS...Being Kind, Polite, Nice, Courteous, Complimentary, Warm, Friendly: After meeting someone and learning their name, Wilbur would always say, "Great name!" This is just one part of the congenial way in which he acted upon meeting someone and it illustrates the attributes which we should show in our relationships, both old and new. In the same train of thought, Charlotte compassionately befriended Wilbur, when it looked as if no one else would, even though by doing so she was potentially opening herself up for ridicule and humiliation from the other animals in the barn.

(Read Quote #3)
"A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly." Proverbs 18:24

(Read Quote #4)
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, [m]eekness, temperance..." Galatians 5:22-23

(Read Quote #5)
“Put on therefore...mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; [f]orbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.  And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness.  And let the peace of God rule in your hearts...” (Colossians 3:12)

LOVE IS...Being a True Friend: When Wilbur asks if all the barn animals are friends, Golly the gander replies, "We've been here together all our lives." Wilbur then responds, "I'm not sure being in the same place is the same thing as being friends." This brings to light the topic of true friendship.  Proverbs 17:17 tells us "A friend loveth at all times."  True friends shouldn't just like each other--they should LOVE each other with the pure love of Christ, which is charity. Therefore, the description of “charity” in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 should serve as our model of how  friendship ought to work:

(Read Quote #6)
“Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.  Charity never faileth.” (1 Corinthians 13:4-8)

Is it just me, or does that last bit sound very familiar?

LOVE IS...Looking Past Stereotypes and Surface Details to See Inner Worth: Wilbur was the first, but not the last, to look past Charlotte's creepy external appearance to see what's really important--her inner worth. This is what our Heavenly Father does and it is what he asks us to do, as well.  We can find the perfect description of this perspective in the scriptures.

(Read Quote #7)
“the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7)

LOVE IS...Childlike Humility: Worried about whether Fern had a problem (in saying that the animals could talk and "tell the greatest stories"), Fern's mother discussed her concerns with the family doctor. When asked if animals could possibly really talk, the doctor answered: "Maybe children just listen better." Perhaps we should become more like a child and pay closer attention to what Heavenly Father is trying to tell us in our own lives.  After all, Christ himself tells us that we cannot enter the kingdom of Heaven unless we become like children.

(Read Quote #8)
“Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.  Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as [a] little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven.” (Matthew 18:3-4)

LOVE IS...Keeping Our Promises: Charlotte promised Wilbur that she would make sure he got to see the winter snow. When questioned how she could save him, she essentially said that, although she didn't know what she was going to do, she had made a promise, and she always kept her promises.  Heavenly Father, who is perfect, always keeps His promises, also. A search in the Topical Guide for the word “promise,” reveals 352 statements involving Heavenly Father’s commitment to keeping his promises.  Clearly, He wants to impress upon us the importance of being true to our word and he leads us in this by example.

(Read Quote #9)
“Blessed be the Lord, that hath given rest unto his people Israel, according to all that he promised: there hath not failed one word of all his good promise, which he promised by the hand of Moses his servant.”  (1 Kings 8:56)

Later, in Matthew 5:48, Jesus tells us, “Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father, which is in Heaven, is perfect.”  In our pursuit to become more like Heavenly Father, we should keep the promises we make, in the same way that Heavenly Father keeps his covenants with us.

LOVE IS...Being Willing to Subjugate Our Will to the Will of Our Heavenly Father:  Charlotte's Web is a study in how the humblest and most despised of creatures can have an impact.  In the same way that Wilbur the pig, Charlotte the spider and Templeton the rat changed their community for the better through what they did, so Heavenly Father can use one or two people to have a great effect, and he often chooses the people who might outwardly seem the least likely to be able to rise to the occasion. Think of Jonah and Esther, Moses and Mary, Nephi and Joseph Smith.

Of course, the most perfect example of someone who put Heavenly Father’s will ahead of his own was our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, who humbled Himself as a man, who was born in the humblest of places and into the humblest of circumstances, who grew up in despised areas such as Galilee, who spent his life serving and associating with those who were themselves despised by society.

(Read Quote #10)
“But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty; And base things of the world, and things which are despised, hath God chosen, yea, and things which are not, to bring to nought things that are...” (1 Corinthians 1:27-28)

LOVE IS...Being Willing to Sacrifice for Those We Care About: Although Templeton the rat was caustic and unlikeable, he made a real contribution to Charlotte’s plan to save Wilbur.  Templeton risked his own safety to scavenge labels with words for Charlotte to weave into her web. Wilbur kept Charlotte’s egg sac safe at the fair and later transported it back to the farm with him, protecting it until the spiderlings were safely hatched.  Charlotte herself worked tirelessly to help Wilbur and in the end literally gave her life so that Wilbur could live, illustrating the sacrificial love of friendship. Again, this points to the Saviour, who worked tirelessly all his life to do his Father’s work and in the end literally gave his life so that all humanity may gain eternal life.

(Read Quote #11)
“Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” (John 15:13)      

(Read Quote #12)
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)
  
How do we follow our Saviour and Heavenly Father’s example of how we should love?
(Ask for input from the class.)

The Saviour Himself provided the answer with this profound declaration in John 14:15: “If ye love me, keep my commandments.”  When asked to name the greatest commandment, Jesus did not hesitate. “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind,” He answered. “This is the first and great commandment.”
Coupled with the second great commandment – to love our neighbor as ourselves  –  Jesus’ words make clear to us that love ought to be at the center of everything we do in our own family, in our Church callings, and in our interaction with the world.  Love is the healing balm that repairs rifts in personal and family relationships. It is the bond that unites families, communities, and nations. Love is the power that initiates friendship, tolerance, civility, and respect. Love is the source that overcomes divisiveness and hate.  Love should be our walk and our talk, for when we truly understand what it means to love as Jesus Christ loves us, our lives take on new meaning and our relationship with our Heavenly Father becomes more profound.

Why should we “love the Lord Our God” with all our heart and with all our soul and with all our mind?
(Ask for input from the class.)

Heavenly Father did not give that first great commandment because He needs us to love Him. His power and glory are not diminished when his children disregard His commandments, defile His name, or even deny his existence. His influence and dominion extend through time and space independent of our acceptance, approval, or admiration.

No, God does not need us to love Him. But we need to love God!  For what we love determines what we seek.  What we seek determines what we think and do.  What we think and do determines who we are – and who we will become.

We are created in the image of our heavenly parents; we are God’s spirit children.  Our Father in Heaven has given us, His children, much more than any mortal mind can comprehend. Under His direction Jesus created this wondrous world in which we live. God the Father watches over us, fills our hearts with breathtaking joy, brightens our darkest hours with blessed peace, distills upon our minds precious truths, shepherds us through times of distress, rejoices when we rejoice, and answers our righteous petitions.  He offers to His children the promise of a glorious and infinite existence and has provided a way for us to progress in knowledge and glory until we receive a fulness of joy. He has promised us all that He has.  If all that is not reason enough to love our Heavenly Father, perhaps we can learn from the words of the Apostle John, who said in 1 John 4:19, “We love him, because he first loved us.”

Why Does Heavenly Father Love Us?
(Ask for input from the class.)
                          
Think of the purest, most all-consuming love you can imagine. Now multiply that love by an infinite amount – that is the measure of God’s love for us.

God does not look on the outward appearance.  He doesn’t care one bit if we live in a castle or a cottage, if we are handsome or homely, if we are famous or forgotten. Though we are incomplete, God loves us completely. Though we are imperfect, He loves us perfectly. Though we may feel lost and without compass, God’s love encompasses us completely.  He loves us because He is filled with an infinite measure of holy, pure, and indescribable love. We are important to God not because of our résumé but simply because we are His children. He loves every one of us, even – perhaps especially –  those who are flawed, rejected, awkward, sorrowful, or broken. God’s love is so great that He loves even the proud, the selfish, the arrogant, and the wicked.

What this means is that, regardless of our current state, there is hope for us. No matter our distress, no matter our sorrow, no matter our mistakes, our infinitely compassionate Heavenly Father desires that we draw near to Him so that He can draw near to us.

How Can We Increase Our Love of God?
(Ask for input from the class.)

Since “God is love,” the closer we approach Him, the more profoundly we experience love.  But because a veil separates this mortality from our heavenly home, we must seek in the Spirit that which is imperceptible to mortal eyes.  Heaven may seem distant at times, but the scriptures offer hope: “Ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.”

However, seeking God with all our hearts implies much more than simply offering a prayer or pronouncing a few words inviting God into our lives.  We increase our love for our Heavenly Father and demonstrate that love by aligning our thoughts and actions with God’s word. His pure love directs and encourages us to become more pure and holy. It inspires us to walk in righteousness—not out of fear or obligation but out of an earnest desire to become even more like Him because we love Him.

The first step to walking in righteousness is simply to try. We must try to believe. Try to learn of God: read the scriptures; study the words of His latter-day prophets; choose to listen to the Father’s voice, and do the things He asks of us. Try – and keep on trying – until that which seems difficult becomes possible – and that which seems only possible becomes habit and a real part of who we are.

How Can We Hear the Father’s Voice and Feel His Love?
(Ask for input from the class.)

As we reach out to our Heavenly Father, as we pray to Him in the name of Christ, He will answer us. He speaks to us everywhere.

We can hear his voice as we read His word recorded in the scriptures, as we visit the temple and attend Church meetings, as we listen to conference talks.  His voice is in the bounties and beauties of nature, in the gentle whisperings of the Spirit, in our daily interactions with others, in the words of a hymn, in the laughter of a child.

If we listen for the voice of the Father, He will lead us on a course that will allow us to experience the pure love of Christ and to share that love with our fellowman.

As we draw nearer to Heavenly Father, we become more holy. As we become more holy, we will overcome disbelief and our souls will be filled with His blessed light. As we align our lives with this light, it leads us out of darkness and toward greater light. This greater light leads to the gentle ministerings of the Holy Spirit, and the veil between heaven and earth can become thin.

Why Is Love the Great Commandment?
(Ask for input from the class.)

Heavenly Father’s love for His children is the core message of the plan of happiness, which is made active through the Atonement of Jesus Christ – the greatest expression of love the world has ever known.  How clearly the Savior spoke when He said that every other commandment hangs upon the principle of love. If we do not neglect these two great laws – if we truly learn to love our Heavenly Father and our fellowman with all our heart, soul, and mind – all else will fall into place.

The divine love of God turns ordinary acts into extraordinary service. Divine love is the motive that transports simple words into sacred scripture. Divine love is the factor that transforms reluctant compliance with God’s commandments into blessed dedication and consecration.

Love is the guiding light that illuminates the disciple’s path and fills our daily walk with life, meaning and wonder.  It is the measure of our faith, the inspiration for our obedience and the true altitude of our discipleship, for love is the way of the disciple.

I testify, as the poet Robert Browning knew, that “God is in His heaven.”  Our Heavenly Father  lives. He knows and loves and is mindful of each of us.   He hears our prayers and knows the desires of our hearts. He is filled with infinite love for us.

Let us, in return, become women who love God with all our heart, soul, and mind and who love our neighbor as ourselves. When we understand and practice these two great commandments in our families and in our daily lives, we will begin to understand the true meaning of love.

May we learn to stick up for those who can’t stick up for themselves, to care for those who can’t take care of themselves.  May we practice being kind, polite, nice, courteous, complementary, warm and friendly.  May we come to understand the value of being a true friend, the importance of looking past stereotypes and surface details to see a person’s inner worth.  May we exhibit childlike humility and may we keep our promises.  May we always be willing to subjugate our will to the will of our Heavenly Father and, when necessary, may we be willing to sacrifice for those we care about.  In short, let us take the example of a simple children’s storybook as a model of how we should love our neighbors, our family and our friends, always remembering that when we show love to those around us, we are merely reflecting the love of our Father in Heaven.

In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.